While the actual motivation varies for each individual person, we are each motivated by something. Some people are hungry for success, fame, and fortune; others are driven by time with their family, early retirement, food, and several other tempting motivators. 

David was motivated by seeing God at work. He was asking God, in the words we looked at yesterday, to be near to him, restore his joy, and now he was telling God how he would respond to God’s generosity...

When I get my hands dirty with dirt or even food, I have an urgency deep within me to clean them. Regardless of the reason, if I am in danger, or if I simply want to get the substance off, my body sets off an internal alarm that notifies me that solving this turmoil urgently is necessary. In a similar way, I long to get rid of the guilt and responsibility I feel when I sin or disobey God. I often have a focused intention to cleanse my soul of the grime that lingers within me. In the book of Exodus, God connects this inner feeling of sinful grime with a physical solution. 

When David was writing Psalm 51, he was very aware of God’s intention to continue a relationship with Him. He not only saw God as his Creator, but as the one who gives resources and support without the expectation of receiving anything. God is our benefactor who gives generously without needing anything in return. 

David wrote about the relationship God initiated with him at the beginning of his life, long before he was anointed king, defeated a giant, led an army, or became king. He thought back to the delicate way God cared for him when it was clear David had nothing to offer him, before his birth....

At the beginning of Psalm 51, David begs God for mercy and compassion due to his awareness of the gravity of his sinful choices. David feels remorse and asks God to not give him what he deserves. 

You see, David understood one of God’s roles in his life is to be his judge. The way David measured his own value was completely hinged on the way God viewed him. He was in constant pursuit of being right with God, of restoring his relationship with God, and he was hyper aware of the ways that he fell short and sinned against God. Due to his posture of repentance, it is unsurprising that David began this psalm with humility, direct ownership, and confession. 

Nathan revealed that David, himself, was the spoiled wealthy man. Not only did he steal a prized, beloved companion of the poor man, he stole his wife. Then, he covered up his sin by having a man killed. David swiftly agreed that he sinned against the Lord. 

In response, David was told his son, who was a product of his affair with Bathsheba, would die; he mourned for about a week until his son died. This may be the precise time that he wrote these words...

Throughout the rest of David’s life, David continued to pursue knowing God and honoring Him with his life. Later in his life, he desired to build God a temple, relied on God when his son was trying to kill him, and wrote dozens of songs and poems of gratitude that were published. David, yearned for God to receive the glory–even until his final breath.

Loss can be an overwhelming experience for all of us. When each of us were young children, we would tantrum or burst into tears at discovering a toy missing or when in need of our parents. If you have a good memory, you may recall one of these experiences where you felt deep loss and had no hesitation communicating your needs. More often than not, we hope for mercy (not receiving what we deserve) and grace (receiving something we didn’t earn), but at other times, we are seeking the consequences of our actions. 

It is no longer rare to find me in a puddle of my own tears as we worship with our church community, in prayer, or simply as I deeply feel alongside my friends in the shadows and valleys of life. These dark corners, where the consequences of sin, brokenness, and human limits are devastatingly apparent, you will also find those who deeply mourn.